Thane

I know, I know, I haven't blogged about our awesome road trip to Alaska and anything since. I will do that...tomorrow...I promise...maybe. Anyway, in the meantime, I just had to insert a couple conversations with Thane. He's so incredibly random...just like his mommy. This kid cracks me up!

Thane:  I’m going to go to Caleb’s school park and play and stay there forever and ever and you will never see me again.

Me: Well, what happens when you get hungry?

Thane: Eat my pants

Ben: What happens when you have to go poop, who’s gonna wipe your butt.

Thane: Me!

Me: What happens when you get cold?

Thane: Pee my pants.

Well  then, as long as you have a plan…

Thane: Mommy, can you take off my skin?

Me: Why do you want to take off your skin?

Thane: So I can be dead. I want to be a polar bear.

Me: I’m not seeing how any of this relates.

Thane: Take off my skin. I want to be a polar bear. Someone will shoot me and I will be dead. I will be a nice polar bear to you guys (eyebrow wiggle)

Butter Obsession

I've mentioned Thane's butter obsession before, but I really think we are nearing the point where intercession is needed. My friend Alena was over and we were chatting in the living room when I realized that I hadn't heard from or seen Thane in awhile. I decided to look for him. My search led me into the kitchen.

That couldn't be a child, could it? I opened the door just a little....

Wow Thane. hiding in the fridge? What are you eating?

 "I eating butter mommy."

Gross. Yep, that was a new stick of butter when he started. The foil outer cover didn't stop him. He found the goodness inside.

Dinner Conversation

Warning: this post involves poo. Stop reading here if poo grosses you out.

You never know what conversation will occur around the Kumor dinner table. It is a special time that always makes us smile. Tonight, the conversation was interesting. Ben had to have a talk with Thane about why he needs to ask mommy or daddy to help him wipe after he goes potty.
Let's rewind a bit here....
Thane is such an independent little fellow. He honestly thinks that he can do anything that Ben or I can do. Lately he has decided that he can go potty all by himself whenever he wants/needs to and subsequently take care of the mess. Some of you have been fortunate enough to witness this. He will drop trou and start peeing wherever he feels like it. The bushes at church, a tree at the zoo, or even the car tires. Now, this is not his fault. Because he decided to potty train himself at an inconvenient time for me, I have had him pee outside many times when I forgot to have him go before leaving somewhere that had a facility. The whole wiping thing though, yeah...just a little gross.
Yesterday I noticed that he was walking around naked. I said "hey buddy, put your pants on." He left the room and came back with his pants on. Later that day I went into the bathroom and found that he had went number 2. Sure enough, inspection revealed that Thane was the culprit. He hadn't even asked for help! I cleaned him up and explained that he should ask for help next time. Guess I wasn't clear enough.
 Today, I hear him in the bathroom while I'm feeding Luke and tell him I'm coming. I walk in to find him post poo, squatting and wiping his butt on the rug. He has reached around to see if he got it all and is now wiping his hands on his shirt. Really? I can't get my 5 year old to even try to take care of this himself, but I am begging my 2 year old to let me know when he is going to go to the bathroom. Something is wrong here.
Fast foward back to the dinner table...
Ben summed it all up well with these statements to our children.
"Caleb, there are a lot of things that you don't think you can do, that you can do just fine by yourself. Thane, there are alot of things that you think you can do by yourself that you just need a little help with. What we need to do is find a happy medium."

New Material

I'll just preface this by saying that Thane is going to be great for this blog. He gives me new material every day.
On to the story...
As if you weren't worried enough about those "play tubes" at fast food joints, I'm going to give you another reason to think twice before cutting your children loose into them. (Although as gross as this story is, I can guarantee my children will still be playing in them.)
Anyway, yesterday we met the cousins and went to the Burger King play area. It's a great place to socialize while the kids stay entertained, so when my phone rang and I saw my long winded landlord was calling, I did not hesitate at all to take the call. After all, I had to talk to him and I thought that this would be better then at home with them climbing all over me and yelling in the background.
About 5 minutes into the call, I look over and see that Thane is outside of the play area starting to take his pants off. Immediately I tell him to keep his pants on. My landlord hears this, laughs, but then continues giving me instructions for the move out/key exchange. Thane meanwhile has ignored my request and manages to get his pants and underwear completely off while staying out of my reach. (My reach is not that far in the first place, but it was further stinted by Luke being in one arm and the phone being smashed between my shoulder and ear in the other.) At this point I am mouthing desperate pleas for Thane to put his pants back on. He responds by spreading his legs, raising his pants and underwear in the air, wiggling side to side and singing "I peed my pants, I peed my pants!" He has done this dance/song before and even though frustrating, it makes me laugh every time. Big mistake. He sees my attempt to hide the smile and thinks it's an opportunity to make it a game. At this point, he throws his underwear and pants on the table and takes off toward the door that separates the play area and the main restaurant. Fortunately my landlord is wrapping things up at this point (I'll have to call him back to get the instructions since I wasn't paying attention). I put Luke down and head to the door while firmly calling "Nathaniel Bruce!" (Can I just insert here that this is exactly the reason we named him Nathaniel instead of just "Thane". When he is in trouble I need something longer to yell.)
As I'm heading toward the door that Thane has now managed to open and disappear into I look up at the glass wall surrounding the door and see a cop looking in. I just knew that an indecent exposure ticket was in our future...if not today...then someday!
Steam escaping from my ears, I push open the door and watch as Thane runs a big circle, careful to run by EVERY TABLE in the restaurant, and stops when he catches my eye. It was like in one of those western movies and I could hear the background music in my head. I didn't say a word, just flared my nostrils and pointed to the ground in front of me. He slowly made his way toward me and I stood my ground. At about a foot away I think he realized the error of his ways and tried to flee again...this time for his life. Without a phone and baby this time, I was able to snatch his little arm. He got a little pop on his naked butt and we gathered our stuff and left. All that being said, I have no idea where that puddle of pee was/is. I'm sure some child...maybe even yours, sopped it up with their jeans. I would like to give a shout out to them. Thanks for cleaning up the mess.
Where Caleb would have been distressed for hours about being punished, I believe that Thane truly forgot about the whole incident within 5 minutes. When we got in the car he looked at me while I was buckling him in and said "I wuv you mommy, you so so super duper bootiful....can we watch movie on way home?" Awesome kid!

My dear children...

I've decided to start updating my blog again. Mainly because I think I will make it into a book for my children someday...so that they will understand why I turn crazy in my old age.

You know the kitchen faucets that are handheld and extend to about 6 inches outside of the kitchen sink? Yeah, Thane knows about them too. He discovered ours while I was in the shower today. From the bathroom I heard the water hitting the kitchen floor and knew exactly what was happening. I yelled for him to stop and told him not to make a mess.

When I finally made it into the kitchen, I saw the chair up to the sink and a lovely lake of water on the kitchen floor but no Thane. A little bit of searching and I found him, hiding in the pantry. His little eyes were peeking out at me and I said "Thane, what are you doing honey". He answered very sweetly, "I 'fraid of you mommy".

...and no, I didn't punish him for this one. That kid is so ornery, but he is just so darn cute. I just asked him very nicely not to do it again. He answered with a sweet "yes, mommy".

Caleb: year 4 recap

I keep a word document open for each boy during the year and write down the funny things they say. Since Caleb just turned 5, I was looking through his document. This is definitely the funniest year yet- so I just had to share some highlights:


October:
Caleb: "Get out of here slime monster"
Mommy: (yelling from bathroom) "Yeah, get out of our house slime monster! ....Caleb, there is a slime monster in our house?"
Caleb: "Yeah, Thane is the slime monster"
Mommy:"Ohhhh, was that Thane that just sneezed?"
Caleb: "Yeah, he slimed all over his face. I could wipe it with a broom!"
Mommy:"Uh, how about we use a tissue."

November:
Cousin Katie: "Caleb, how do you know so much about dinosaurs?"
Caleb: "Oh, I don't know, maybe it's because I have a great brain."
Katie: "Oh, yeah! What's 50 + 50?"
Caleb: "Ummmm, 10?"
Katie: "No, it's 100!"
Caleb: (Puts head in hands) "Arrrgh!"

December:
I thought I heard Ben coming down the hill in his truck so I told Caleb to look out the window because daddy was coming. Caleb informed me that it wasn't daddy, but a silver truck. As he sat there watching out the window he mumbled "Mommy, you are the girl who cried daddy!"

February:
(Caleb runs into room) "I can stop you if I can" (evil laugh)

March:
I was cutting some chicken for dinner with a large knife when Caleb did something to make Thane cry in the living room. I said "Caleb come here, right now" and when he came into the room I turned around quickly, knife still in hand. I said, "Caleb, you better be nice to your brother!" He got a very concerned look on his face and said "...or you'll cut my head off?"

April:
While I was showering, Caleb read Thane a nursery rhyme book. When I got out I said "wow Caleb, did you read him that whole book?" Caleb replied, "Yeah, I sang him all the songs too...(giggling)...but Rock a bye baby didn't turn out very well because Bowser was in it."

Take that HIPPA!

Many of you may not know this, but I have been secretly persuing my medical degree part time while still taking care of the children at home. It's been long and hard, but I have evidently completed enough schooling to help out the doctors here. Okay, not really... but I did get to help. Yesterday, the guys working on the generator building ran out of bricks so David offered to stay home with the children and let me go observe Ben work at the hospital. I jumped at the opportunity because 1) I like being around Ben and 2) I have never seen him at his work. I made it about 10 minutes in the ER before I teared up. Ben was taking care of a little girl who had an abscess on her leg that he had to cut open and drain. The poor girl was terrified of Ben but after a shot of ketamine she was knocked out. Across the room, Dr. Andy and Dr. Jim were pulling and tugging (I'm sure they were doing something a little more directed then just pulling and tugging, but to an outsider that's what it looked like) on a little guy's arm to reduce a fracture he had received from falling out of a tree. He was screaming in pain and his poor family was just standing beside him crying. It was so sad to watch but after they finished, Dr. Andy so kindly asked me if I would like to help put on his cast! (Now, help is probably not a good word, because he obviously could have done it without me and probably would have completed quicker, but I was pretty excited that he let me participate.)

After this I went back and watched Ben see a few patients. It was really fun to see him in his element. I was pretty impressed with his ability to communicate in Pidgin. He really has picked up a lot! I know I am biased, but I think he's pretty amazing.

Today there was still a shortage of bricks so David stayed with the kids again just for the afternoon and I went with Ben again. I really enjoyed just watching him and occasionally chatting with the patients. (This is pretty hard since the only phrases I know are "what's your name", "where are you from", and "are you alright". Of course, they aren't alright, that's why they are at the doctor's office. So that just leaves me with two phrases.) One lady who came in talked really good English, so while Ben was out of the room we chatted about alot of things. About 10 years ago she was hit over the head for no reason and had spent time in the ICU. She was back because of pain. Her and all of her siblings were pastors with the Assembly of God church. She was so sweet, and I really enjoying chatting with her.

After Ben was done we went to the maternity ward to make sure everything was quiet before heading home since he is on call. There was a little baby there who had an infection and just didn't look good at all. His poor mommy was standing beside the bed in the nursery just crying and watching. The baby was having apneas so while Ben was standing there, he told the mom to stimulate the baby by tapping his foot. Then Ben and the nurse went to get the medicine they were going to start him on. Right after they left, the mom just kept hitting the boys foot repeatedly trying to wake him to the point that she couldn't tell that he was breathing. I showed her to put her hand on his belly and that when it went up and down this was good- but if it wasn't going up and down to tap his foot. I then told her "pikinini bilong me, same ting. I pray for you". It's true, Caleb had apneas as a little new born, but it was nothing like this. There were moniters and wires surrounding him that would alert the nurse if his Oxygen sats dropped too low, and buzzers that would rouse him if he stopped breathing. Nurses were there within seconds to tap his feet if that didn't work. I do know how worried and helpless I felt though, and this mom was feeling those same things. I asked her his name so that I could pray for him, but she said he had no name yet. I remember last time we were here one of the missionaries told me that sometimes they will wait over a year to name them since there are so many infant deaths. So I asked the mother's name so I could pray for her. I couldn't quite hear her, but it was something like Ellie, so if you think of it, could you say a prayer for her and the baby. God knows who he is.

As I left the room after trying to comfort her, Ben said to me, "that baby isn't going to make it". I guess in my mind I hadn't even thought of the baby dying, I was just concerned for the poor mommy and how she was feeling. This hit me pretty hard though and I had to leave. I guess I don't know how he does it- I felt completely overwhelmed at even the thought that this child might not make it but he has dealt with actual deaths multiple times here. One of the sweet missionary ladies said to me that tears are okay, God is crying for them too. What love He has for us.